More Than a Sex Surrogate: A Unique Memoir About Intimacy, Secrets and The Way We Love by Seraphina Arden

Author:Seraphina Arden [Arden, Seraphina]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2019-11-30T18:30:00+00:00

(Sometimes he puts me through the wringer. There are meetings when I get out drained as if I’d lifted weights. It would do him no harm to practice some positivity, ease, distance himself from himself and his little dramas. He’s as heavy as a lead ball. He has to laugh at himself a little. It’s heavy for whoever was facing him. And his hidden story would will probably stay that way. Interesting.)

Rubber Crisis

The level of safety and protection of the patient and surrogate are very high and include examinations, insurance, and of course, the use of condoms.

A man who arrives at the clinic with erectile dysfunction or any sort of sexual dysfunction doesn’t need terrifying additions, and a condom is terrifying.

Don’t tell me tales.

Yes, it’s a nuisance, it has a dodgy smell, an absolutely non-sexy product, does not add charm to the magnificent creation called phallus; and I’m convinced that it’s no joyride for them either, not to the phalluses nor the men attached to them.

I believe that this item changes the scents of all the participating liquids and can introduce fungi and inflammations. After all, it’s rubber.

In the treatment room there’s a green drawer and in it a variety of condoms in all colors and sizes. Thin, extra thin, no lubricant, extra lube, ribbed, xxl—a fiesta of various rubbers. In my experience there is a need for xxs, but it’s not profitable.

“So, at this stage you’ll have to get used to a condom. Have you ever used a condom?” An idiotic question for most patients.

“Uh..yes.. sort of.. I don’t recall now... it’s not complicated, right?”

Or the reverse, “I’m not putting that thing on me. Are you nuts? There’s no way it will work, can’t we stray from procedures?”

Answer: No. We can’t.

There is a stage in treatment that is called ‘putting on a condom. The patient, usually terrified, is sent home equipped with several condoms and is requested to practice putting it on as well as masturbating with it.

Few carry out the task. Not because the are unable; rather because who desires that?

“So, how did it go? Did you do your homework?”

Luckily I’m a teacher and know the material—the stale excuses.

“I didn’t have any at home and I thought I did; I lost what you gave me and the pharmacist is my neighbor so it felt weird; I got tangled up with it, stressed out and pulled hard, so it finally tore; I had a stressed week at work, don’t ask; I didn’t feel like it this week; and the ultimate one, I didn’t understand that I should try at home.”

What did you think, I wonder, that you received a condom to sleep with under your pillow?

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